


a minotaur and a goblin walk into a bar...

by nonbinarywithaknife (littleboxes)



Series: me sobbing about critical role [28]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Romance, crack and humor, honestly this is more of a prologue than a chapter, i'll go back and edit the tags once we do, part two is double the word count dont worry, still dont have a spelling of the minotaur
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-05 16:34:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17922398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleboxes/pseuds/nonbinarywithaknife
Summary: nott seduces herself a minotaur with the help of friends old and new





	a minotaur and a goblin walk into a bar...

**Author's Note:**

> prompt by anon on tumblr: please do write minatour man and nott dancing for a weird date, that would be so cool and awkward probably

“Would you like to dance?” Ulomon says, and then immediately wants to curse himself. She is four feet smaller than him! But- he sees her face brighten, and how can he take back the invitation now?

So, he thanks the Light his arms are as big as the rest of him, and leans down to reach her hands. They walk out to the dance floor together, and draw a fair amount of attention. After all, the Sunbreaker himself, out dancing with a  _ goblin _ , of all creatures? He would to growl at them, but he is above such petty displays.  Instead, he focuses all of his attention on Nott, and making this endeavor as successful as possible.

“I’ve… never actually danced like this before,” she says, face flushing a dark(er) green. He laughs.

“Neither have I, so at least we shall approach it together,” he replies.

He has to nearly double himself over, in order for them to dance comfortably, and even then, they’re not graceful in the least. But it’s nice, swaying to the music, and they stay on the dance floor for several more songs before taking a break.

He thinks of their… date, so far. He was shocked, initially, when she’d flirted with him. Assumed it to be a bawdy joke and no more. But then, she continued to proposition him. And it was- nice, to be desired for more than his station (even if he was still quite surprised that she didn’t know of him  _ at all _ ).

So he’d agreed, finally giving  _ her _ a shock for once, and they’d dined at a nice restaurant in the northern part of Assarius. He was a little embarrassed about how long he’d spent picking out his outfit for the evening- eventually settling on his armor and a nice bow tie that had been a gift from his sister. He’d spent several hours polishing his horns, hooves, and armor to a shine, as well.

He’d gone a little slack jawed when he’d seen her walk in, as well, but he felt perfectly justified. After all, she’d been wearing a beautiful tuxedo outfit that seemed too beautiful for the surroundings, and her forest green hair was inter braided with ribbons of varying color.

It had been a little awkward at first, of course, but once they found some common ground (”Oh, you are a fan of roasted rats as well? I’m so glad to have found a fellow connoisseur!”) the evening flew by.

Truly, she was a delight, and he could honestly say he was looking forward to their next meeting. 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> the best thing about the sunbreaker is that we have no idea what he's like as a character and that means i can make him Soft without remorse


End file.
